Surviving the Shit Days

Some days don't just test us – they break us down and rebuild us.
And lately? I've been living through those days on repeat. Because, the last few months, let's just say… if life were a video game, I've been stuck on "Extreme Mode" fighting too many bosses.

Building a business from scratch while living in one of the world's most expensive cities, with a mortgage, a family, and a full inbox of unread "let's catch up soon's".
Yup. Stressful AF!
Add in too many sleepless nights and a few "friendly" whispers of self-doubt, and it's a party.

But here's what I'm learning the hard way: Shit days are part of the deal.
Growth is messy. We don't get stronger without lifting heavy things, and sometimes, we're the heavy thing.
So this week, I want to share something simple but real. Something that's helped me keep going when everything feels too much.

You don't have to fix the bad day. You just have to get through it.
That's it.
No hacks. No shortcuts. No Instagram quotes with sunsets.
Just survive.

I listened to Harvard Professor Arthur Brooks on the Kevin Rose show a couple of months ago. Brooks had a few insightful suggestions for dealing with a bad day. I needed some help, so I’ve been your guinea pig and tested them out.
I'll warn you upfront, they're simple, although not easy. But they have made a difference.

1. Move Your Body

This one is first because it's essential, and it's actually the easiest on the list.
If you don't like the gym or working out - walk. Get outside and take a 60-minute walk. NO DEVICES! Give your brain a break from the firehose of social media and work noise to spend some time with yourself in the open.

Last week, when I had a particularly bad day, I forced myself to walk along the cliffs near my house for an hour. I started full of anxiety, but ended calm. Something about the rhythm of walking itself seems to process emotions.

A Harvard study showed that movement of any kind reduces anxiety and lifts mood by pumping endorphins and regulating cortisol. Just 30 minutes can reduce anxiety symptoms by up to 30%.

2. Lean Into Your Feelings

Lean into the thing you're feeling.
There is nothing wrong with you, you're not broken because you're having a shitty day. You're actually alive!
So, how do you remind yourself you're alive? Write down the 5 things that are bothering you today. Why? Because you want to lean into and understand these things.

This is not easy. It goes against everything we know and feel.

"You're having aversive emotions because your limbic system is sensing that something is a threat to you." Arthur Brooks.
So, ask - what is that threat? Is it real? Write it down, you're going to learn about yourself in an intensely interesting way. Study yourself with fascination.

Journaling helps process complex emotions. It gives your mind a name for what you're feeling, and names give you power because they transform vague, overwhelming feelings into specific challenges you can address - Psychology Today 

3. Express Gratitude

This one is super woo woo. I avoided it for years, but stay with me.
Write down the things you're grateful for. Even when you're at your lowest, you can still identify a few things you're grateful for.

Humans have a negativity bias that's an evolved state - it's here to protect us.
That rustle in the bushes, if it's a tiger, and we run, we save ourselves. Negative emotions keep us alive. Positive emotions are a nice-to-have.

I seem to always look at the negative side of things, especially on bad days. I call this my doom loop. But you can't be negative and grateful at the same time. Fact.
Start with something small and obvious. For me, the easiest one is that I’m grateful for my daughters’ giggles.

Gratitude can literally rewire your brain. This Berkeley Study shows that ten weeks of writing down three things you're grateful for can equal a 12% bump in happiness.

4. Leverage Your Support System

This last one wasn't on Brooks' list, but it's on mine because having my wife in my corner has been a hugely undervalued life hack. I know it's not always easy to open up to your wife/husband/partner/brother/sister - but just try.
It's tough to admit emotions and struggles to ourselves, and it's often even harder to admit them to someone close to us. But, if anyone will understand and be your support, it's this person.

I can't stress this enough - letting "your person" in when you're having a shitty day can be a game changer. No partner? This works just as well with a trusted friend, sibling, or even a parent who gets you. The key is finding someone who listens without immediately trying to solve everything.

Final Little Reminder:
Some days are just fucking hard.
Don't underestimate yourself.
At this point in your life, your success rate of getting through hard days is 100%.
That's no joke!

See you next Friday.

And, that’s all folks!

Thank you for reading the latest edition of my newsletter.
As always, comments and feedback are welcome.

And, please don’t be shy to share this with a friend or family member. Each week, I’ll share something that helps us find balance.

Peace, love and growth.
Jazza

PS - Did you know?

I work with a small, select group of humans and business owners.

Some are looking for a co-pilot to stop white-knuckling the controls, and others want coaching to achieve that elusive thing called “balance” (yes, it exists… allegedly).

I’m fully booked at the moment, which sounds very cool and exclusive, because it is. But if you’re the kind of person who plans slightly ahead of their next meltdown, reach out for a 15-minute chat.

We’ll see if you’re weird and brilliant enough to join the list.

Tell me what keeps you up at night (besides questionable lifestyle choices).
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